“The Lord also declares to you that the Lord will make a house for you.”

2 SAMUEL 7 (11)

I woke up today wanting to dance with the Lord. Then I remembered I had, in a dream, in a place that I can only go with Him when I shut the world off. 

Not all mornings are like that. Most are filled with 5 am wake up calls to rush to a place I don’t want to go, being somewhere I don’t want to be. I imagine most of the world lives this way, going to the same place day in and day out, waiting, wanting more but succumbing to the greatness of the day, withholding action, and failing to see there is something more…

So when I took these last two weeks off of work, I looked forward to my children, to the quiet, to the messy days and the anticipatory nights. It would normally take me days to loosen up and accept the days away from my busy career, but this time was different. This time I made a conscious decision to relax when the vacation days arrived, the very first one. I wasn’t going to waste not even one moment, even with three screaming children, and no plan. I decided I was going to try out this Holy Spirit thing the way God intended it- free fall. Wherever the day took us, that’s where we would go.

We live our lives so stifled, boxed in, sitting in cookie cutter grandeur, being free but not free. We know what we want, but don’t go after it. Instead we read self-help books, or our bibles or stories about everyone else who “made it,” the ones who followed their dreams. Maybe they got up one day and said, I’m just gonna do it, or maybe God gave them a swift kick in the behind and said just do it already! Either way, as a self-professed former self-help Junkie now turned Jesus follower, I recognized that the dream of the dance was God’s way of saying, Let go, jump into the ocean, anything is possible with me.

The difference between the self-help world (which I still love and read from time to time) and the Jesus world is that while all those books made me feel good, gave me focus and drive and mottos and the I can do its!, they never did sustain me. When the juice ran out of my motor several weeks after the fabulous read, I was left with nothing, except of course another self-help book. But with Jesus, I keep dancing, I am dependent on Him to sustain me. I don’t have to reach for another book. I know He’ll lift me up off the floor and we’ll keep on dancing…

It’s fine to have a mission statement in life or repeat affirmations like, “I am beautiful” or “I can do this.” But if there is nothing to sustain that, to deepen that, to make it living and breathing, then I have found there is nothing there at all. If we surrender to nothingness it is a good start, because surrender is where life truly begins.

I haven’t picked my mission statement just quite yet. I am still trying my very hardest to surrender to the day, relax and let God do what God does best, surprise me.

Are you ready for the ride?


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