I did it again. I’ve ventured off the road into the world.. I mean its par for the course at this point. I get swept away from time to time by my insatiable craving to change my life, to live for the future and to not be content in the now. People talk about it, sermons preach it and the church has embraced it. God has this really big plan for you, it’s just waiting out there, the proverbial Jesus carrot on a stick, and I always fall for it- hook line and sinker.
The new fad these days is the 21 day anything. The 21 day Daniel fast, the 21 days it takes to form a good habit, or break a bad one. In just 21 days, you can be a new person! I’ve heard it integrated into Catholic radio and on the You Version bible app which begged me to complete one of their “plans” and let everyone and their mother know about. I got a little Oprah-esque about it and started to fall down into the pit of why am I stuck here God and my life is not good enough and wah wah wah. I became so obsessive that I got tired of myself, like I could close my eyes and overnight poof, I would be instantly delivered into a mission field somewhere where I would be saving starving children in Africa and really making a difference, not sitting here in my middle class life with my middle class job and my middle house with my middle class kids doing… nothing.
I started a bible plan which made me dreamy Jesus promises and I saw cupcakes and rainbows out in the pasture. God will tell me what his dream is for me! All of this will mean something and instantly I will understand the why God why. Modern day Christianity is a Trolls train-wreck, we just haven’t noticed it yet.
We are so busy chasing, wanting, panting… even those of us that are doing it for God. It’s exhausting. Our intentions are in the right place but our thoughts are worldly, why is it that where we are right now is not good enough? Why is it that we feel unimportant and unused by God? Because that “message” is seeping into our souls like a deadly poison, especially if we think that where we are is unnoticed or unplanned by our sovereign Lord.
I’ve already gotten myself off of social media, yet it still follows me. The 21 day message has now made its way into Christian media in various formats, t-shirts and bible plans. Like the Jesus carrot that leads you down the rabbit’s hole, I have found nothingness there. I am no more important in Africa than I am here.
If I could be here, exactly where God’s placed me, I’d be present. And if I am present, that brings realness, and if I am sucked out of the 21 day vortex I am back on God’s time, not mine.
Let your manner of life be without covetousness, being satisfied with the present; for He Himself has said: “Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5