Hollywood, Florida · Hurricane Irma

Six Dead at Nursing Home, what the hell are we doing?

Internet is back, so what. I have survivor’s guilt. While I sit in my now air-conditioned house with running internet as of this morning I am profoundly affected. I am not sure how my previous post got out to all of you, but by the grace of God, internet was working for a couple of hours and then went down right after the post published. Three days of no television and internet was a God send. Until this morning when internet and cable were back and the first thing I read was that two people had died in an overheated nursing home. Hours later now it’s five. Just updated- Now it’s Six. The world somehow suddenly seems sadder. I am helpless because I do not know who needs me. So God has called me to pray.

I visited our church this morning which now has electricity. Wednesdays are Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.  Jesus is exposed for all to see. We came to drop off supplies for residents of the Keys, and found the church open. The Catholic church open. We are open! So much of the reason I became a Catholic. We are always open. Church doors- Open, chapel- Open, food pantry- Open. My eldest and I put on our veils and sat with Jesus to pray. My heart is hurting. Where are the ones suffering Lord? I have died inside for them. For those that want to talk about signs and prophecies, it’s time to stop- this is a call to the hearts of the human race. God has more sense than that, thank you Leonard Pitts, Jr.

We the church. Is it time for theology? Is God angry? We are fools to believe that natural disasters are about God’s wrath. And by the way, God didn’t ask you for your opinion, unless it is to tell people to start loving one another. Is God anything else than that? This is the face of God, the hungry, the helpless, the widow, the orphan, the elderly. What the hell are we doing about it?

If you think your prayers don’t matter, you are dead wrong. I’ve prayed my rosary as fervently as I’ve ever done. To some it will be foolishness, to others (Christians) I am going to hell. You can come look at what’s going on and tell me my prayers are wrong or don’t matter. All I see is the suffering face of Jesus…

Is it more important that we proselytize people in their pain and anguish or be there in the midst of their pain and anguish? Are we not Jesus in these moments? Is it not us who are called to do these things? Be the church. The sacred heart of our Lord. There are so many in need…

I am not wondering why the storm came, I am praying for souls. If this is what God has sent me to do, this is my job. Did Jesus not cry for Lazarus? Is He not affected by every inch of human pain? How do we become Him, even but for a moment…

What are we to do in these hours and days? Be prepared, pray, go check on someone.

And for God’s sake stop making the rest of us Christians look bad. 



21 thoughts on “Six Dead at Nursing Home, what the hell are we doing?

  1. Survivors guilt M? You better not. No more than why do the wicked prosper. God is good this way, and error free as you know.

    I have family in Tampa, and truth be told, there were conversations that as you know, could have easily been the last. If we are to show fidelity to the text, and Him, then we can still bless God when saying: ‘He giveth, and He taketh away.’ All our minutes in life are on loan. In all the destruction, He did not take away too much!

    Still, some will shake their fist at Him, but you are right, we need not berate them as they shake the fists, but offer a life raft. So many rafts available, it seems yours is prayer. Glad you and yours are well.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, I am sending out many emails for prayer as we speak for those nursing home residents. My heart just bleeds for the elderly, so many so helpless.
      Yes we had so many of those conversations, unsure of what to come. I praise God for bringing us to my mother and father’s house and allowing the light of Jesus to shine there, they are simply precious to me…

      I love that offering of a life raft, how beautiful! I can even see the vision of that, I needed it.

      I was praying that exact prayer during the storm, Lord you give and take away, Blessed be your name.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. The best way to help is to follow Jesus’ example. He wouldn’t hesitate to serve those in need. We are not Jesus, but if we take care of those in need, we’re doing it to him as well. Our prayers are one way to give help. You are also giving your children beautiful examples of what it means to be a Christian.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sometime Sis, ALL we CAN do is pray! Let me ask you; when you are praying for all those strangers, hurting and confused and you are spending time at Rosary (this is one Christian who won’t condemn praying the Rosary!) and sending up intercession for people you don’t know, what motivates you? Love, love for others, Godly, unconditional love?? You will never recoup that time you spent praying for people you may never meet this side of Heaven, so tell me, how much of your LIFE are you giving up unconditionally for others?? Yeah, they pretty much are rhetorical questions, but many Christians don’t think of prayer or giving their lives for others in those terms! I may not be able to die for others (giving my life for others in that sense) but I can give up time I might be basking in the sun on a tropical beach (sarcasm, yes) so that I might intercede for those choking on the smoke of adjacent wildfires, or those wading in two feet of slimy, stench-filled water because of hurricanes. I CAN and you CAN put forth fervent prayer for all those who are going through painful loss and those wondering when they will eat next!
    Our God Almighty, our Heavenly FATHER is as close to us as a whisper, nay, closer than a thought and He is listening to our hearts and spirits and acting upon those things we don’t even know how to ask for!! Such a loving and gracious Father we serve!!!
    We can pray that God will send Whom He will when we don’t know if we are able (no matter how willing the spirit) and He listens and He moves upon those fervent loving prayers! And the souls we intercede for!! All we can do is intercede not knowing, sometimes never knowing if they heeded His call or rejected His GRACE BUT — that doesn’t negate the love that motivates us to keep praying in SPITE of what things appear!!
    I look at the world around me; it is in your face vulgar and crude and I cry out to God, when will you send Christ Jesus back, and He ever so quietly whispers, “soon, very soon,” but then I cry and tell Him, save more Father, SAVE so many more. For the sake of my peace and comfort I would go right now, in the next heart-beat, BUT, there are so many who still need to be able to make that choice. It is their choice, so true, but they have to KNOW to be able to make it, whether yes or no the choice IS theirs, so, I keep praying, keep preaching and teaching that just one more will be saved; and then just one more and one more still! What you feel dear Sister is that “just one more Lord,” urging! It IS heartbreaking, but how can we do anything else, we MUST continue to pray until Jesus Christ once more says, “It is finished!” Then and only then will our prayers be to no avail, for the work WILL be complete.
    So dear Sister, keep praying, keep DOING, for that is true love, that is unconditional Godly Love, that is what we are commanded to do, that is what PROVES we ARE His children!!!
    God bless you Sis, cry, but don’t despair, pray and do not doubt for it truly is GOD Who does the work AND He DOES answer our prayers!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! What beautiful and thoughtful words my brother, I couldn’t have said it better. I will keep praying- 7 now are dead and I fear many more to come… Please pray…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Remember Sis, because there is SOOO much to pray about that when you don’t know what to pray, the Holy Spirit within is will be praying; all we need to do is continue to make the effort!! God bless you greatly Sis!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. if we are unable to physically attend to the needs, then we attend to them through our prayers—our conversation with God.
    And no survivors guilt…and I love what CS says about offering a life raft….For HE is our safe harbor in the midst of the storm!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes He is. Now seven confirmed dead… 150 nursing homes in Florida being checked and no legal requirement for a generator. So i continue to offer my “life rafts” in the form of prayers, waiting to hear from God on what to do next…


  5. Okay Melissa, I thought about this post for several hours before replying. So let us get some perspective here, as you have been through a lot. Still going through it.

    Survivors guilt: I seem to remember a picture of some beautiful children and a dog. All nestled in their beds (pallets) with visions of sugar plums dancing in their heads. And you feel guilty because you survived????? Why were those kids asleep during the worst storm which ever hit the Atlantic coast? Because of their mother, father, and grandparents. Can you imagine how they would be right now, if something had of happened to one of their siblings, dog, parents, or grandparents? They would be standing watching someone close a lid on the coffin watching them lower it into the ground. Praise God Melissa, that you survived if not for yourself but for your kids.

    Now take a deep breath, breathe God in, and stay still for a moment in that place.

    Those people in the nursing home, that is horrible, awful, and if it were not for God, unforgiveable. None of us ever know our hour, day, or how. We must believe they are in such a wonderful place now, and all of their suffering is over.

    My Mom was in a nursing home, Melissa, due to Alzheimer’s. I do not know if I will ever forgive myself for putting her there or not? Those are some of the worst places I have ever seen. Mom was treated well because me and my Dad were continuously up there, and we let them by with nothing. They knew one wrong miss, and as I always told them, “Something happens to her, I am coming, and hell is coming with me.” I have to ask where are their family members? During Harvey my cousin had to go and get her Mom out of the nursing home to live with her because they lost power. Her Mom also has Alzheimer’s.

    Now to the rest of it. Melissa, you, your family and the rest of us are doing all we can do. I am not saying this to “toot my horn” but I want you to think about this, as I am not the only one. In Mass Saturday night I asked Jesus to go to you instead of me. I also ask Him to go and protect every single person in Florida. I gave up the grace and mercy for myself received in the Holy Eucharist for all of you. The brightest moment of that weekend for me, was that little note that you and your family were fine. I knew He was there. I humbly thank You, Jesus.

    I know many others in my Church were doing the same thing. My friends and myself had been praying a week before it hit. There are many of us who love all of those in the whole state of Florida. If I could of commanded those winds to stop I would have. In fact I did try in the Name of Jesus.

    Now I know you are ready to sacrifice yourself for others as well. Melissa, God gave to you those children and I may be wrong but I do not think He is ready to take you yet. Thank you God! Raise them Melissa, teach them the love of God, as I know you can. Bring them up to love, have faith, and trust in Him. Right now let that be your sacrifice, as He saved you all. That is truly your purpose in life, at this moment. We give up our whole lives for our kids, don’t we? No greater sacrifice then that outside of the Cross.

    I am joining in praying the Rosary with you and have been since before Irma hit. Many are praying for and with you. Then we have to step back and trust, Melissa.

    Suffering is hard Melissa. Watching others suffer to me is even harder, as it is to you. When we are at this point in our lives, we are never more Christ-like. We are feeling the pain of Jesus on the Day of the Cross. I do not believe we are ever loved by Him so greatly, as we are in these moments.

    Now, I want you to bring your soul into a quiet still place, so you can hear what God wants you to do. It may only be prayer, may be an action, or whatever. But just be still so you can hear Him. We are still helping those down in Houston. Again, remember St. Faustina said, “God cannot deal with a chattering soul.” He will lead you to what you are to do and where you are supposed to be. He will do the same with the rest of us.

    You know I love you with all of my heart. You have been through a whole lot, and sometimes Melissa, after things such as this and the aftermath, we have to get ourselves grounded again. Love you, wish I was there with you, God Bless, SR
    PS If you still have my email you know you can email me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are here with me sister. Your words have really touched me as it has been a difficult day.
      The kids and I watched the first part of the movie in Mother Teresa’s life last week and I had taped the second half which was aired during the storm. Praise God when our electric and cable came back the movie was there! I gathered the kids together for the second part of the movie tonight.
      One of Mother Teresa’s helpers, Anna, was stricken with MS and forced to go back home to London. But Mother gave her a special job, to pray for the work they were doing. I had to hold back the tears, God spoke directly to me, just as He has all day. Through so many outlets He tells me I am needed, I am needed to pray. Sometimes you feel so unworthy and helpless when you are stuck where you are. But I’ve heard Him loud and clear, pray, pray, pray.
      I much like Edith Stein seemed to be deeply affected by the anguish of others, and my soul hurts to no end. I imagine their dying faces, they cannot speak, I imagine our Lord. My heart aches. We do not know why some live while others die. I pray for their souls. I offer up myself, my body in prayer for them and their families. I realize that nothing else matters in this world than the love of God.
      For all the hurt and pain I’ve been through in my life, I’d go through it all again just to know Jesus was on the other side. He wants us to hurt deeply for the souls of others so we are moved to prayer. I have never felt so impacted in my life. I’ve loved my kids more, taught them how important caring for others is because those “others” are our Lord. I do not know why God chose me out of so many other Jewish women, but then again why did He choose Mary? Because He knew that she would say yes…
      Thank you for your love, your friendship and your witness. It is because of people like you that I know that I am not alone.
      God bless you my precious sister for giving up Jesus for me in the Eucharist, I felt Him and He sustained me and your sacrifice did not go unnoticed.
      Love you-


  6. I knew it was a “difficult day” by your words. That is why I really had to think and pray before I responded. I gave to you what I felt God was putting on my heart.

    You know you do not have to thank me for “The Eucharist.” I told you that, to get you grounded again. If it had not of been for that, I would have never of mentioned it.

    As Mother Teresa said, “Do small things with great love.” “Find your own Calcutta in your own community.” We cannot save the world Melissa, but we can help those who God gives to us. One at a time. I know if this person comes to you, they are helped, if not, they are still helped by your prayers. I love you and God Bless, SR

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wanted to thank you anyway 🙂 Just reminded me to do it. It is necessary and warranted when someone does something out of such great love for another… And I pray that when called upon I can do the same for you.
      Yes Calcutta seems to be right here, I continue to pray and to ask God where and how He needs me. For now it is investing in my precious children, teaching them the faith and helping them to live it. Lord may I raise these little ones to love you and look after your most vulnerable, orphans, widows and the outcasts of our society.

      Liked by 1 person

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